A photo from the May 18th Uprising by Na Gyeong-taek, former photographer for ‘Jeonnam Ilbo’

Martial law was not lifted throughout the second semester of 1980. As I took on the role of head of the literary department at the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences, I became increasingly busy. There were many events, and each required permission from the Martial Law Command. All manuscripts were subject to investigation.

After submitting a manuscript, I had to wait to be called. If the manuscript wasn't approved, the event couldn't proceed. The Martial Law Command was located at the provincial government building. Most manuscripts had red lines drawn through them, and explanations were demanded.

A Time When We Had to Bury May 18th in Our Hearts

Even literary expressions like longing or waiting could be subject to various interpretations. A sentence could easily be connected to Kim Dae-jung if he was inserted as the subject.

Looking at the face of the lieutenant who was interrogating me at the time, he clearly seemed to be a ROTC or Reserve Officers' Training Corps officer who had just received his insignia. As someone who had recently completed my own military service, I felt a sense of camaraderie with him as a fellow young man. I gestured towards my lower body.

“When this part gets excited, how can I not feel longing?”

We both ended up looking at each other and laughing. The manuscript was then approved without issue. This kind of situation continued throughout the second semester.

As we went through the second semester, we had to live with May 18th buried in our hearts. It was a forbidden word, a dark shade of melancholy that should never be brought up again, the silence of our youth.

If the intellectuals and prominent figures of Gwangju had not initiated a movement to return weapons, the situation would have spiraled out of control. They say they truly rolled up their sleeves and persuaded people desperately. I heard the reason was anxiety over unknown figures wearing masks.

In the process, most of the friends put down their weapons and left the ranks. The tragedy of May 18th ended to that extent thanks to the Gwangju figures. This is what could be called the true spirit of May 18th.

Testimonies from North Korean Defectors Regarding May 18th

It is wrong for foolish individuals to boast about stealing weapons and attacking police stations as if it were a matter of honor. People who were deceived by numerous rumors are still refusing to deny the false claim that virgin breasts were cut out. The suspicion that countless young people were killed and buried in unmarked graves remains unresolved. Regarding the missing persons, defectors from North Korea say the following:

“Towards the end of May 18th, there were young people who wished to follow the agents returning to the North. However, they could not keep up with the agents who were doing mountain chạy 5 km per hour. In the end, they had to kill them and bury them to leave.”

The testimonies of North Korean defectors continue.

“The special forces who returned were welcomed by Kim Jong-il. The venue was the Mokran Pavilion in Pyongyang. All received the title of Republic Hero, and those who died were buried in the Patriotic Martyrs' Cemetery with symbolic graves instead of bodies.”

On May 12, 2020, classified diplomatic documents from the US CIA and State Department regarding the North Korean subversion plot in South Korea's May 18th Uprising were declassified and released.

According to these documents, there was a statement that ‘the Gwangju May 18th Uprising was a riot by North Korean agents aimed at overthrowing the state.’ Furthermore, CIA records state that on May 26, 1980, a North Korean representative and a US representative met at Panmunjom and concluded the May 18th Uprising through a meeting.

Including May 18th in the Preamble of the Constitution is a Reversal of Truth

I have maintained a love-hate relationship with May 18th over the years. And each time numerous errors and flaws were revealed, I called for rational judgment amidst the criticism and ridicule directed at May 18th. My argument was that citizens who died unjustly should not be ridiculed.

Therefore, I suggested that ‘let us now bury May 18th in history.’ This was because I believed that if May 18th were to be exploited further, it would be in serious danger. However, an announcement was eventually made to include it in the preamble of the Constitution, and immediately after, May 18th faced criticism that was almost to the point of mutilation.

I am a witness who experienced May 18th firsthand. I saw countless weapons and heard unimaginable rumors. At this point, including May 18th in the preamble of the Constitution is a reversal of truth and a contradiction of justice. Recently, the court acknowledged in the ruling of Dr. Ji Man-won that external forces were involved in May 18th.

Therefore, May 18th does not end with its inclusion in the preamble of the Constitution. Responsibility must be taken accordingly. Thus, May 18th has opened Pandora's Box of truth that must be buried until the end. Given that rigorous and brutal controversy will undoubtedly follow, I explained the reasons why the preamble of the Constitution should not allow its inclusion in an article titled ‘May 18th Should Not Go Anywhere Near the Constitution.’

And for that, I was sued by the city of Gwangju and May 18th organizations. While undergoing police investigation, I sensed an invisible hand pressuring the police during the investigation process. The police investigator used extremely petty logic to fabricate a crime.

“Because it was implied, it was stated.”

Implied, therefore stated? I could only laugh while reading this indictment. It was a forced logic to create a crime. The South Korean police should not behave this way. This shameful and pathetic logic was an irony and sophistry.

Even if the direct superior gave an order to create a crime, and even if that direct superior was under political pressure from May 18th organizations and the Democratic Party, the South Korean police should not create crimes.

It is Time for May 18th to Enter History

With this, I have withdrawn my affection for May 18th and become its enemy. An enemy… I have made enemies of the May 18th organizations and the city of Gwangju, whom I should never have made enemies of. They have abandoned the ‘ordinariness’ that would have protected them. I am an ordinary person.

In the past, because the Korean Teachers' and Educational Workers' Union made me an enemy, I fought against them for over 20 years. This happened in 2002. The Korean Teachers' and Educational Workers' Union must have believed that I would yield quickly to lawsuits, accusations, and threats. However, I abandoned fame and self-interest, and I have fought without yielding, no matter how harsh the years have been. I am still exposing the harmful effects and wrongdoings of the Korean Teachers' and Educational Workers' Union.

It is the same with May 18th. I will have no choice but to be an enemy until May 18th is buried in history. This is the beginning of the tolling bell that will ring for May 18th. I can defeat them.

As advised, if May 18th itself does not want to enter history, and if they want to continue to make it a living entity to be exploited, we will bring May 18th to hell with numerous truths at the forefront. Thus, it will have to be buried.

We will expose the approximately 4,000 false recipients of national merit, revealing their lawlessness and dirty true identities to the nation and the world. Let's see if they can hold their heads up in front of history or our descendants.

Our May 18th, which remains in red blood within our passionate youth, is dead. All that is left is a tattered flag trampled upon by dirty tricksters, politicians, and spies who have violated the National Security Act.

Truth is wavering. Wind, blow. And depart, my love! Youth of May 1980! Goodbye, May 18th!

Addendum: Whenever I visit my alma mater, Chosun University, I think of the ragpickers who lived in the drainage pipes under the sports field. In the evenings, smoke from cooking fires would rise. They were children without parents, abandoned by the world. In the morning, they would line up in front of the school gate to go into the city to collect scrap. They had bright, unashamed faces.

After May 18th ended, they all disappeared. They likely died or scattered. Pain arises. Even now, the smoke from cooking fires often rises in my mind as a distant memory.

However, more than 40 years later, figures like Moon Jae-in, Choo Mi-ae, Lee Seok-gi, Kim Kyeong-su, and Jung Cheong-rae have appeared, exploiting the suffering of these children. I cannot simply watch the suffering of the ragpickers who went into the city with smiles and those who exploit them. I must fight.

◆ Jeong Jae-hak, Poet

Poet, national merit recipient, columnist, Park Chung-hee presidential promotion committee member, 36 years of teaching service in Jeolla Province